Mastering others is strength; Mastering yourself is true power – Lao Tzu
The mirror of Dharma, a Buddhist teaching, offers the idea that we must look inwards to explore the root cause of our suffering & its our attachments & ignorance which cause our suffering.
Traits you dislike in others tend to be similar traits that you reject about yourself. When someone does or says something that triggers one of those traits a initial response can be to react & defend yourself.
These triggers are often unresolved issues & suppressed memories buried deep within the subconscious. When a situation arises that triggers you, something is surfacing that needs to be healed.
One of my triggers is rejection. My instant reaction is feeling unwanted. I can blame others for not making me feel cared for. But what I am experiencing is a manifestation of a painful belief that I am not worthy. It triggers uncomfortable emotions from my past. Often in these situations my first response is to protect & defend myself due to feelings of shame & isolation.
As we can learn that other people are mirrors of ourselves, we can appreciate they appear on our path to help us learn lessons & grow, presenting an opportunity to heal old wounds.
Small Steps –
NOTICE – what emotions are arising.
BE KIND – show compassion to yourself.
REFLECT – what is triggering you.
IDENTIFY – the traits in them that you see in yourself/something that you feel is missing in you?
AWARENESS – Try & pinpoint an origin for the trigger. What needs to be healed at this time?
Identifying how people are our mirrors & unravelling your truth can open the door to your inner power & the possibility of healing within. This empowers an honest relationship with yourself & your relationships with others.